Virginity testing can be a valuable tool for teaching young Zulu girls about their culture and traditions. It offers an opportunity to learn about important figures like uNomkhubulwane, the Zulu goddess of fertility, and to understand the significance of preserving one's virginity. However, it's crucial that these girls receive a more holistic education.
As a young girl from a small township in Pietermaritzburg, I used to go for virginity testing at a place called Swapo.
I vividly remember the first time I went there. I was happy to finally learn certain things about my Zulu culture, such as the ukusina (Zulu dance). As much as it was not foreign to me I didn’t know how to do it like the other Zulu girls who were raised in rural areas.
I was happy that I was going to be part of a group of girls who were going to be taught about how I should behave and how I could navigate my teenage life into becoming a young woman. As a bonus, I was going to learn more about my culture.
Don’t get me wrong ukuhlolwa (virginity testing) is a beautiful experience for any young girl and learning about uNomkhubulwane.
Nomkhubulwane is the Zulu Goddess of rain, nature, and fertility and is regarded as Mother Earth.
I also enjoyed learning about the importance of preserving your virginity and being protected from sexually transmitted diseases.
However, the older women who our parents and society has entrusted to, to teach young girls about self preservation must stop placing so much emphasis on marriage. That should not be the only reason a woman should remain a virgin.
We were told that as virgins we carried ‘gold’. I believe that a young girl’s ‘gold’ is her education and her financial independence.
I’ve always dreamt of going to university and graduating but when my sisters and I were part of that group of girls, I don’t remember the elders telling us that they would love to see us in graduation gowns.
What I remember them saying was that want to see us getting married as virgins. Which is great but what will a 20-something uneducated woman be doing in marriage?
I liked that they always emphasised that when a girl turns 16 years old a ceremony called uMhlonyane must be held by your family. Your family has to slaughter a goat for this ceremony. The ceremony is important in my culture as this is where the parents of a girl tell their ancestors that she is now in puberty and ask for her to be protected till she grows up to be a woman.
When a girl turns 21 years old, her parents must slaughter a cow to say thank you for respecting us by not putting us in shame by getting pregnant out of wedlock.
After that, you are expected to find a husband and be married. Now all these things are beautiful and I love that the cultural leaders nagged our parents to do these things for us and preserve our culture.
But why was education and independence not emphasised?
I don’t remember the amaqhikiza (the older girls who were our leaders) graduating from university. But I remember them being praised for being virgins, when they were around 25 years old and being asked if there is someone who is planning on asking their families for a hand in marriage.
What I observed is that the emphasis on marriage made it seem like an achievement for girls. There is more to life than being a married woman. Maidens should be taught to dream big and know that they can be anything that they want to be in the world, rather than only being told to preserve their virginity for a man. And often times the girls end up marrying men who have already fathered one to two children. Some families don’t see anything wrong with this just as long as the man can afford to pay lobola.
That should not be the case.
Girls should be empowered with knowledge and broadening their horizons, they should be made aware of opportunities that are available to them. We can help these young girls build a brighter future for themselves by teaching them how to respect their bodies while honouring their cultural heritage.