Nokulinda Mkhize, a revered sangoma and author, has released her latest book, Kitchen Wisdom: What We Hate to Hear But Need to Know About Men and Romance, an insightful exploration of love and relationships.
Drawing inspiration from the advice of mothers, aunts, and grandmothers, Mkhize provides readers with practical insights designed for women weary of modern romance's false narratives.
In an era where romance can resemble a confusing maze of mixed signals and unrealistic expectations, her book stands out as a beacon of old-school wisdom.
The author explained that her observations over 17 years revealed a stark reality: many women are striving to balance successful modern identities with the desire for nurturing and meaningful romantic engagements.
“Women are complaining that ‘amadoda awayekeki’ (men are irresistible), yet they find that the complexities of modern romance often bring tremendous pain and heartache,” Mkhize noted.
“This deep-rooted confusion frequently leads women to make poor compromises in order to secure male attention,” she warned.
Mkhize asserts that while societal norms may have evolved, the emotional landscape remains unchanged. “Just because we are modern in our lives, it does not mean our hearts are modern in their feelings,’’ she stated.
Acknowledging this emotional dichotomy, she encourages readers to draw strength from the wisdom of loving communities comprised of women who have traversed similar experiences.
The book further identifies principles that women must embrace to make informed decisions in their romantic lives. Among these are essential guidelines such as “Never Chase A Man” and “Do Not Do Wife Things Before You Are The Wife.”
Furthermore, she cautions against the influence of “Fake Friends and Frenemies”, who can erode the supportive networks women need to thrive outside the sphere of male affection.
“Ultimately, Kitchen Wisdom serves as a reminder that strong relationships with other women are complementary and necessary for a balanced view of romance,” Mkhize emphasised.
She says encouraging women to compare their experiences and learn from each other, the book empowers them to reclaim control over their romantic choices.
Saturday Star